Save and Enjoy

My wife gets her eyes cut up by lasers soon.

Lasers...is there anything they can't do? Oh yeah, feel love. Poor lasers, and their lives without emotion. Someone should write a science fiction poem about that.

Okay then, I will.

Laser Love

Oh lasers,
You heartless bastards,
So shiny,
So wanting to be touched,
By God that hurt,
Why did you let me touch you?
Now I only have 3 fingers,
And that one finger was my favourite finger.

I called it pointy,
but it wasn't my pointer finger,
I just pointed with it,
to be different.
Different from you.
I thought it'd be easier to be different that way,
Rather than getting my dick pierced.
And it was.
But now it's gone.
Not my penis.
But my finger.
My pointy finger.
Second from the right.
On my right hand.
My good hand.
My God that hurt.

Oh laser,
Oh you heartless laser.
Why can't you feel?
Because I can feel.
Feel the pain of the finger you burned off.
Oh well.
Life goes on.
Let's go have toast.
Toast is better than you remember it being.

---

It really is though. Toast, I mean. You never crave toast, but you're never disappointed by toast. You're always like, "hey, this is pretty good. I should use my toaster for toast more often," but then, like, hey, who wants to make toast, when you could have honey roasted peanuts? Right. Unless you're allergic to nuts. And who isn't these days?

Here's the dinner menu for Maggiano's Little Italy:

Baked Shrimp Oreganata
Gulf shrimp topped with our seasoned bread crumbs, baked and served with tomatoes and basil; served with a white wine sauce.
Barb's Spinach & Artichoke al Forno
Diced Artichoke hearts, spinach, tomatoes and asiago cheese baked with alfredo sauce until bubbling and golden; served with crispy Foccacia bread.
Bombalina Platter
An assortment of our favorite Appetizers, including Stuffed Mushrooms, Crispy Zucchini, Bruschetta, and Spinach Artichoke Al Alforno
Bruschetta
Italian garlic bread toasted and topped with a tomato bruschetta relish made of diced tomatoes, balsamic vinegar and roasted garlic.
Calamari Fritte
Crispy Calamari coated in egg whites and seasoned flour, deep fried and served with our marinara sauce.
Crispy Zucchini Fritte
Strips of zucchini hand battered and fried, served with a zesty lemon aioli cream sauce.
Four Cheese Ravioli, Pesto Alfredo Sauce
Ravioli stuffed with ricotta, parmesan, mozzarella and provolone cheeses; topped with pesto alfredo sauce until golden brown.
Thin Crust Pizza
Maggiano's Style-Thin Crust, Imported Fontina Cheese, Italian Sausage, Tomato Pesto Sauce and Oven Dried Tomatoes.
Jumbo Lump Crab Cake
Delicious Lump Crabmeat served with a side of mustard sauce.
Mozzarella Marinara
Whole milk mozzarella cheese breaded and fried,topped with provolone cheese and marinara sauce.
Mushroom Ravioli al Forno
Ravioli stuffed with mushrooms, marsala wine, parmesan cheese and baked with alfredo sauce until golden brown.
Mussels, Tuscan Style
Prince Edward Island mussels steamed in a garlic and white wine sauce with sun-dried tomatoes and white beans.
Sliced Tomato, Fresh Mozzarella (Seasonal)
Sliced beefsteak tomatoes, fresh mozzarella cheese; drizzled with our Italian Vinaigrette.
Stuffed Mushrooms
Jumbo mushroom caps stuffed with spinach and topped with our seasoned breadcrumbs; served in a white wine sauce.

Oh, and Jeff, I get the comments emailed to me, so I DID get that comment.