Sunday, January 30, 2005

Check out my new cornrows, made with real corn

Crippling depression...mmm...like the touch of an old lover, whom liked to beat you to a crying senseless puddle of mud...that someone passing by decided would be a good place to take a shit.

Anyway, I purchased an entertainment center (or an EC) from Pier 1 today, for $525 (because I'm made of money, or at least was, until I bought that), when I could have gotten a floor model with an easily fixed irregularity for $349, because I wouldn't have been able to fit the not-in-a-box floor model into my Honday Accord. I guess I do need an SUV like every other Minnesotan. They were right, I was wrong. Or at least I need to make a friend with a pick-up, to pick-up my shit.

I doubt I can even fit the box in the car, whenever they get that EC in stock. Because of course, it wasn't in stock. Because Pier 1 stuff is so popular that the things they have to sell, they don't actually have.

But the chair I was going to get at HOM (cute) Furniture would have take 2 weeks to be made to the colour I wanted anyway.

But I'll buy that chair later, when I have money again. Which will be in a little while, cause my salary is crap and all. Because the shittier the job, the shittier the pay.

Well, actually there are a lot worse jobs than mine at a drill bit factory. I don't have the risk of drills going through the center of my hand (actually happened to someone last month). I've never been at a job where there are some many people going in for surgery per month.

My nephew can almost walk. I didn't get to see him for 2 weeks, and now he can waddle his way to me for a few steps. Time passes too fast. He was so proud of himself, all like "see me, Uncle Bri! I'm da Boss Baby #1 of walking, huh!", with that little smirk and raised eyebrow he does when he knows he's the center of attention. 11 month old babies shouldn't be able to have only child syndrome that early.

George Lopez has now talked for a half hour about child beating.

I figure, if I stay up forever tonight, tomorrow won't come, and then I don't have to work. Or, I'll be so completely tired tomorrow, that people will think I'm sick, and send me home because of fear of contamination. (They actually lysol my desk and send me home if I look the least bit ill. That's how horribly disease disgusting I look, all the time, like I'm the most contagious person in the world).

Or I'll just be so tired it physically hurts, and have to work the whole day in pain, and then do a shitty job, and then have people complain about my output that day, the next day, thus continuing the pain.

But on Thursday, we might order in Chinese food.

Tuesday, January 25, 2005

Lost Longings and discarded raisins

I've had things to say, but not the time to say it. Well, kind of, but mostly I've been unmotivated lately. There just doesn't seem enough time in the evening to get everything done that I want to do (ie. sit around and not be at work). But now that I've broken the pudding skin, I'm sure I'll get some writing done on here again. Just not tonight...I've got things to do (ie. sit around and not be at work), but as a placeholder, I'll just post the lyrics to Busta Rhymes' seminal masterpiece, "Woo-Hah!! Got You All in Check".

Yah Yah Yah, Yah Yah
Yah Yah Yah, Yah Yah
Yah Yah Yah, Yah Yah
Yah Yah Yah, Yah Yah

[Chorus]
When I step up in the place
ay yo I step correct
Woo-Hah
got you all in check
I got that head nod shit
make you break your neck
Woo-Hah
I got you all in check
And you know we come through
to wreck the disco tech
Woo-Hah
I got you all in check
Throw your hands up in the air
don't ever disrespect
Woo-Hah
I got you all in check

[1st verse]
Busta Rhymez up in the place true indeed
yes I catch wreck and that's word on my seed
I guarantee to give you what you need
One blood everybody like Junior Reid
Wake up every morning yo I must up seed
Nationwide darkhorse make the world stampede
Yo really let me roll some weed
mad charged nigga now I must proceed
Yo we 'bout to make you set speed
Peace to Baby Phife, Q-Tip, Ali Shaheed
Watch me knock you out like Apollo Creed
Body blow bustin' your shit making you bleed
Just feed off dynamic flows an take heed
Need more information homeboy then just read
Ay-Ya!! you can read all about the pure breed
Do the bogle dance I'll do the pepperseed

[Chorus]

How dare you ever try to step on my suede shoes
Top Gun shut down your Firm like Tom Cruise
Please let me get down and blow a fuse
Actin' fool breakin' shit down to molecules
Yo let me hit you with my ill street blues
Busta Rhymez always headlines the street news
Woo-Hah!!! Yo baby girl don't be confused
Sail my seven seas and enjoy my boat cruise
I know you really want to know who's
comin' through leaving bloodstains and residues
Sorry homeboy but your flow sounds used
Gotta pay your dues baby you know the rules
Whenever I travel the world I landcruise
If you choose to fuck around you get bruised
Now I got you gassed on super unleaded fuels
Get me through give me some space you excuse

[Chorus]

[Rampage]
You now rockin wit the best
the boy scout is who I be.....
...Flip Mode is the sqiddaud
Hah
Yah Yah Yah Yah Yah [8X]

[Verse]
Yo which muthaphucka stole my flow
eenie....meenie miney mo
Throw that type of nigga right out my window
Blast your ass hit you with my direct blow
Bo!! Coming through like G.I. Joe
Star Wars movie deal like Han Solo
Make you bounce around like this was calypso
Always shine cause I got the high pro glow
You think that you can hide you think you can lay low
Roll up on your ass like Hawaii 5-0
Mad out with my dreads in my kango
forget the Moet nigga just pass the Cisco
Yo!! Take a trip down to Mexico
Come back with that shit that might make you psycho
Maximum frequencies through your stereo
Sorry this is it but homeboy I got to go

[Chorus]

Hah
Yo Yo Yay Yo Yay
Yo Yo Yay

. .. Yay Yo Yay
. .. Yay

Thursday, January 06, 2005

27 down

Looking back at the first 27 years of my life, I can think of one perfect moment:

Jody and I were playing Scatagories (just the two of us, because we're cool like that), and Jody had the word, and I had to guess.

She said "Tom Cruise".

And I knew, within a milisecond, that the word was "Cocktail".

Neither of us had even seen the movie in years.

That's what life is all about.

...that's where, you wanna go, to get away from it all...way down in Kokomo's...