My Lessons in Hamburglarese are paying off...in hamburgers!

A Dirty Poem, in Hamburglarese:

NSFW

Robble Robble Robble

Robble

The End

Yeah, I went blue, but it's okay, because I'm so classy.

A Quick Plug

...not that I have any readers to throw over to her, but I thought I'd mention my wife, Jojo, has a blog up at Total Baloney. There's not enough posts about actual baloney, if you ask me (but that's just me), but it's pretty dang funny. As on AFCOB, she puts a lot more thought into much better posts than I do. Ah, some things never change. READ IT or DIE!

I gotta be honest

I don't know exactly what 'broasted' is. Don't tell me...I like a good food mystery.

Rated BS

I wish my job was to decide whether or not a movie had too much comic mischief to be rated G or not. That and to taste delicious candy.

Similar to toast

I think Sherbet doesn't get enough credit for doing what it does so well. In these days of many frozen treats, take some time to thank Sherbet, with your tongue, some day. Especially in this economy.

These days, saying "Especially in this economy" makes everything sound smarter. Even me!

...from Wikipedia

Ah, Wikipedia, you never fail to entertain me. I was looking up "Cheap Seats" on Wikipedia (don't ask), and ended up on the page dedicated to the SNL/Lonely Island video "Jizz in My Pants". Here is the Wikipedia summery of the plot of the song:

The video opens with Samberg singing in a night club. As he is invited to Molly Sims's apartment, he prematurely ejaculates, or "jizz[es] in [his] pants", in the hallway. Taccone then ejaculates in the check-out line of a grocery store, where Sigler is working. Justin Timberlake appears as a janitor in the grocery store. Samberg then leaves a movie theater, when the discovery of a missed telephone call from a girl causes him to prematurely ejaculate. In another scene, Taccone is seen driving his car, listening to the radio, when a song begins to play that reminds him of a girl, and causes him to "jizz in [his] pants". Samberg and Taccone then begin to sing about how they easily "jizz in [their] pants" from an alarm clock, opening a window, eating a grape, and the truth about Bruce Willis's character at the end of The Sixth Sense. Next, Samberg and Taccone explain that, whenever they are next to girls, they ejaculate prematurely, which, they say, necessitates constant wearing of condoms.

...


Thanks, Wikipedia!

My Biggest Hero

A commercial for Monster Jam just told me that monster truck drivers are my heroes. That's good to know, because previously, I wouldn't have guessed that. But it's good to know that my heroes could probably drive over your heroes with gigantic wheels.

real talking

Something that is spoken in movies and television quite a bit, but I've never heard in real life is, "Look out, it's a trap!"...one of these days, I'd love to try to keep someone out of walking into a trap.

Oh, and they say "are you kidding me?!" on Biggest Loser way too much.


Yes, I watch Biggest Loser.